Country and Origami.

Happy Halloween folks! There was a banana walking around campus today, along with a couple of pirates by the stud. quality.

Honestly, I hate Thursdays. I have classes and meetings all day long and by the time I'm done I'm wiped out and HUNGRY. Begged Deanna to eat with me after class and I was spotted by two crew teammates along the way, so it was a nice dinner. Miss crew...don't miss crew. It really is a draw. I don't miss getting up at 4am every weekday, erging every afternoon, fundraising, and COLD COLD mornings. Things I do miss...the team. The race. You know, I've always said that I don't like competition and never liked races but that, I've found out, is a lie. I love that competition. Running or rowing, I loved every minute of the race, no matter how much it hurt to keep going.

That's the thing with races. You never actually stop. I couldn't even tell you how many times I've THOUGHT about stopping but there was always a voice that said, "forget that, push harder." Anyone who has been in that position before would know exactly what I'm talking about. fantastic.

I've got my Disney interview tomorrow. I've thought about it though, and I'm not sure that it is the right time to do this. I'm still trying to get my grades up, and I think I'm just starting to get settled here. But I'm curious about the program so I'll still give it a shot and see where it goes. I got this far, right?

I've started to go back to origami again. I did it quite a bit a few years ago, we even decorated the Christmas tree with all things origami, popcorn and cranberries. It looked beautiful. So I'm going back to it. I have one design down flat, no directions. It's called a "Stellated Octahedron." Here's a picture of two that I made today:

They are like circles with points on them, but you can kinda get the picture.

Shout out to my sister Laur on one of the greatest Halloween costumes!! Have any of you seen Miranda Sings on YouTube? I didn't think it was funny at first but if you keep watching you will be laughing hysterically soon enough. Anywhoooo, that's who she went to school as so I have a picture for you from that too:

She can act EXACTLY like her too. It is literally hilarious. and the resemblance is uncanny. I love it.

I found out something about myself today. I need to do something creative everyday so that I don't actually go crazy. I was thinking about it, and whenever I'm home, I go to the piano when I'm feeling stressed out. So I think that I need to do something like that everyday for just a little while. I think that everybody should have something like that to do too. Just something that you love and helps you to relax. I think that people can forget to relax so quickly and just get caught up in the rush of everything around them. But it's really good just to take a moment.

Anyways, I've been in a country mood today, so here's a little Garth Brooks for you to enjoy:

Time for ice cream.

So, That's Life.

Fade into You.

Disney I am on my way!! well....hopefully. I have a phone interview on Friday at 3 so wish me luck!! I am so nervous and so excited and I really hope I get the chance to be a part of Disney magic. And, I'm not sure if it'll count for a ton of credits for school, but maybe that is just what I need. A little Disney magic and some hard work to help me remember who I want to be.

So today was okay. I had classes, and then group. Which we talked about a lot of things but I'm not sure anyone would really understand too well. It was kinda like a "you had to be there" thing.

Dinner was themed tonight. ohhhhhh the joys of Eick themed dinner. If you've never had one, come to TCNJ and experience it...because it is quite the experience. Tonight was a "Goulish gathering" which meant pink rice, questionable looking chicken, and food that was apparently supposed to look like the insides of a living thing. I've got three words for you TCNJ no.thank.you. So pasta and chicken it was, and even then it wasn't so great. shame.

Then the gang raced back up to the room and was welcomed by a phone call from the cutest cousins around. I could not stop laughing. The three of them were climbing up my uncle to try to see me, and after an accidental end of call mishap again (thanks Jackie) I saw Sofia's room and Andrew told me a hilarious knock knock joke. Ready?

"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Banana."
"Banana who?"
"BANANAPANTS!"

uhhhhh whaaaaa??

But it was hilarious because he absolutely cracked himself up. Literally rolling on the floor because he thought it was so funny.....

So after the facetime I started preparing for the Disney phone call and then it was 10. Nashville timeeeeee. (Sorry Aly!! No AHS for me tonight) And thank you abc for that surprising ending at the end of the show. mouth open. shocked. Love the music of this show so I HIGHLY recommend you listen to all of it because there is not one bad song.

On that note, I'll leave you with one of my favorites from the show so far and I really love it because of the lyrics, and if you listen to what they are saying I just think that it's actually amazing.

Got lots to do tomorrow, along with an advising meeting on Friday but...

That's Life.

Paintings, Beaches, and Goats...Oh My.

WOW. I really need to start posting more regularly on here. Sorry folks. So I've got quite a bit to update you on....here it goes!

This weekend had its ups and downs. I watched Hocus Pocus with my mom, watched Harry Potter, went on bike rides, ate quite a bit (not surprised are you...?), went to the Halloween Parade, made cake pops, and of course, painted. Highlights were definitely seeing my friends together and going to Hoffman's like we usually do, and painting. I carved this pumpkin too!

A little Dracula Mickey for Halloween. 

I honestly could not tell you why I love painting so much, but it's something about the colors. The colors always amaze me. So, I came up with four pieces to bring back to school:

The artwork of the weekend. 

So, now I have almost completely run out of space on the walls, while Deanna's side remains..well...empty. Gotta spruce it uppp. 

So before going back to the conj I took a trip to the beach. It was windy, but so nice. I could've sat there all day if I was allowed to. But, I couldn't so I took a couple of pictures to hold me over until I go back home again.

I just loooooove it so much. You don't need music, no tv, no talking, you don't need anything. It's just you, sitting there, with an endless amount of space in front of you. Coming and going. So many people talk about comparing their lives to the ocean. And you really can, but there is something that really applies right now. Missing someone comes in waves. Some days are good, and some days are bad. They come and they go. And sometimes you feel the worst that you have in a while, and that is when the ocean water really recedes. But only when the water goes back this far, you can have enough momentum to move farther up the beach than you have before. 

Just a thought. 

Well anyways. I had such a nice time at home. But now after a little motivational chat I think I might have a chip on my shoulder. I'm ready to finish this semester, ready to work and ready to fight. We can all have those bad days, we're allowed to. But we do need to have the courage and the will to fight back with everything in our power to win. So, I applied to the Disney College Program today. If I'm not sure where I'm supposed to be right now, I think that is a step in the right direction. I'll know if I move to the next round by November 15th. Basically, the program is where I would work in Disney World and get PAID(hollllaaa!!) while taking classes. It's the perfect step to get to know people so maybe I can be an intern there one day, and then really start my career there. And I can't wait. 

So...right now everything is up in the air. Joining a sorority, studying abroad, staying at TCNJ, anything really. All I know is that I'm here because I'm supposed to be right now, and I'm taking it one day at a time. 

On a lighter note, Deanna and I were HYSTERICAL while on YouTube tonight. I was actually in tears from these videos, so I hope they make you smile too:

That's Life.

Lyin' Eyes.

Hai everyone. After not posting for more than 10 days (!!!) I've finally found enough motivation to post again. I've been having a hard time. Honestly, just going through each day sometimes can be rough. I have great friends. They help. Just being around them sometimes can make me feel a little better. Sometimes, you just need a hug.

We've got a four day weekend coming up here at TCNJ, and it could not come sooner. Seriously, longest week of my life. I can't wait for Point Pleasant food, the beach, movies, ice cream, and a lot of painting and art. Be ready. I've got some great ideas planned. I just love it so much. I've been listening to the same songs lately. Nashville soundtrack and The Eagles. The Eagles remind me of my dad so much. So it makes me happy and sad at the same time. It's really hard to explain. It makes you want to just go back. It's strange how many things you lose when something like that happens. And I just don't think that people understand that. I'm listening to this song right now:

It's nice. Music is just so....brilliant. It brings so many things. So many memories, it creates new ones, it makes you think about things. I actually have a music poster in my room. Love posters.

Yesterday I got one of the greatest surprises ever. I was complaining to Deanna that I was hungry and wanted to go eat and she kept pushing it back saying we'd go after she was done with her homework. So, after complaining a bit, I started reading and got really tired. Little did I know, Deanna and Aly were texting each other planning for her to come stay over tonight. So as I was sleeping, I was woken up by Aly calling me. I answered, tired and confused to her saying, "can you do me a favor? come outside?" Well, that woke me up. I wasn't having a great day yesterday and could not have been happier to see her then. So, she slept over and hung around today. Then part of the Brain Trust crew got dinner together, along with Dan and Deanna. (Hiiiiiiii Carl, this is for you!!) And we had a great dinner.

So, after dinner Aly left, told her I'd see her tomorrow, and back in my bed. Just one more class, go for a run, eat, clean the room, and home tomorrow night. Other than that, nothing else has really been going on. Just going through, day by day, and taking each step at a time. There's a really corny saying that I like:

"When you don't want to look at the past, and you're afraid to look at the future, look next to you and your best friends will be standing there."

I know that whether they are right here, or just a text message away, that they always will be. And that's nice to know. I don't know, this has been all over the place hasn't it....

Well, drawings and paintings to come, weekend is on its way, and well...

That's Life.

Disney Love.

I have the best friends in the entire world. They made me the greatest video in the entire world and I love them so much it's weird. OLIVE YEW GUYS. <3333

Did I mention that I love them? :)

For those of you who check up on the blog, sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been a little distracted lately. After my motivation kick on Tuesday, I've gone on a couple of runs, had my share of breakdowns, and of course, not ready for it to be Monday again. I haven't been too slammed with work, which I'm really happy about. I got all of my work due Monday done on Friday, and I've just been studying for a midterm on Wednesday. Oh joy. pumped.

Yesterday Deanna, Dan and I went to TCNJ Glow, or, as others call it, TCNDayGlow. clever little kids. It went on for FIVE hours, but we only stayed for two...ish. There were so many freshman there and once they started throwing paint the tarps we were standing on started to make everyone fall on the ground. One huge slip and slide. funs. After that Deanna and I left Dan with his friends and just hung out, ate pizzaaaaa, and watched tv. typical. Then I accidentally locked Deanna out of the room while I was sleeping...sorry girl!!

So today hasn't been eventful at all either. In fact, I've been feeling really awful today.  We didn't do anything last night and I feel so sick. I stand up and I feel dizzy and lightheaded and I've felt so awful all day, I've just been in bed. hope it is not the flu. I do NOT need that. hellllpppp :(

I had another thought today. During a commercial with babies in it, having fun and crawling around, something just came to me. (I know that sounds really weird but just bear with me!) When we are little we can just play and do what we want all day. And we can do this until we are about 13 or so. Then we have to start getting a job and working and then we are in high school. Then we go to college, and before we know it we are completely consumed in our careers and saving money for retirement and all of that. Why do we have to do that? I know we still have to, and I know that I will, and I know that I can't change it. But why? I don't want to work forever, I want to do things that I LOVE. I don't want to be stuck doing work all night long. I mean yes, I like computer science, and I want to do that, but it just seems like so much work, and I just want to enjoy everything in life. I don't know how all of you feel, but to me, it just feels a little silly.

I love Disney, as probably all of you know. If I could work there, I would be the happiest in the world. To me, Walt Disney was the kind of person who enjoyed life. He liked to show others how to enjoy life too. That's how I want to live my life. So, I think it is only appropriate for Disney quotes right now:

love.

Well, I guess that's life.

Over the Moon.

I'm not going to talk about my day today, because nothing especially exciting happened to me today. surprising, right? Anyways, I had an ordinary day until just now.

I was working on my computer science lab, listening to one of my rekindled favorites, Demi Lovato. Laying on my bed, I got distracted looking around my room and started getting annoyed because nothing was working. I was looking at all of my pictures when something caught my eye. Right above the end of my bed I taped a note to the wall that my mom wrote to me a few weeks ago. It was pretty long but I just sectioned off this one section. It says, "Love you too much! So very proud of you - we all are. Your dad would be over the moon with your successes. <333 Love, Mom." So, that made me sad. But I taped it right next to this picture:

So I looked hard at this picture. I just love this picture. And all of a sudden, I got motivated. I wanted to show him how I can succeed. I didn't want to lay in bed anymore, I wanted to get up and get stuff done. I wanted to be smart again. Be happier, be excited, go for a run, go and do something. I'm so proud to say he is my dad. 

So I went online and looked at inspirational quotes. Meanwhile, Demi is belting in out the background and I was just so...ready. So, I want you to see what I was feeling. I found these and I just got so inspired:

Listen to these when you are reading these quotes and get ready for life. 

 so I guess what I'm saying is that I'm one step closer. Maybe I haven't quite accepted everything as it is, and that will take time. But I can try to make it better. I can try to be happier. I'm not helpless. I can laugh, and I can smile. We're only given what we can handle, and the best that I can do it try. If I don't try, it was a waste of a chance. And I'm not going to waste any of my chances anymore. It's up to me. I know there will be days where it will feel like the world is crumbling down. It will hurt. And I'll be the first to admit that. But I'm not giving up. I think I've found that spark again. I lost it for a while, and I was in the dark. But it's my turn to lead the way now.  I want a great life, and I won't find it if I don't get up and live.

That's Life.

The Dance.

Ahh Sundays. I feel like everyone in the world should wake up listening to this:

Love.


So I'm back at TCNJ. It was nice being home, but the weekends home always seem to be so short. This morning I had lazy start, just laid in bed for a while before getting up to take a shower. I'll be honest, my diet today consisted entirely of cookies and kettlecorn. I'm not even sorry. :) So I decided to go downstairs and watch Aladdin. Always a favorite. I seriously love Disney, it always puts a smile on my face.

After minor iPod technicalities, my mom and I headed back to the good ol' conj. We listened to country music the whole way back. Apparently Alan Jackson was one of my dad's favorites, and Garth Brooks was also a huge favorite in our house when I was little. I love country music, I know for most people it's not a favorite but I just love it. Here's a favorite from Garth Brooks:

I feel like we listened to this song a lot over warm pancakes and orange juice on Sunday mornings. I just makes me remember a lot of things. Garth Brooks reminds me a lot of Christmas because we listen to a TON of his holiday songs. So you'll hear those too. I love how music can remind you of one thing every time you listen to it. I can remember when someone tells me their favorite part and I will think of them every time that part comes, or what we were doing exactly when we were listening to a certain song. I know that might be weird but music is such a great part of our lives, and there is so much to listen to and enjoy and share and it is just so wonderful. It's comforting and inspirational and it just means so much to me...and anyone really. Ask anyone.

So after my mom left and I hung out with Dan and Deanna as per usual, Deanna went to chapter and Dan and I had dinner. No vanilla ice cream today, a huge disappointment. But it's okay! I remembered that I brought back cookies and kettlecorn that I ate while watching Once Upon a Time when I came back. love. It's the perfect show for me. fairytales with a twist. If you haven't seen it, or even know what I'm talking about, go on Netflix and watch away. You will soon be obsessed. you're welcome. So after realizing that I have little to no self control when it comes to kettlecorn I had to eventually stop eating because all of the sugar was starting to hurt my mouth. oh wells, it was worth it. delish.

So now here we are, I'm laying on my bed, watching Miley: The Movement. It was quite the interesting program. I've always loved Miley, and even though she does seem a little on the crazy side...she's just being herself. Life's What You Make It. I admire that. And I love her music. She really is a Rock Star. Just don't watch the videos, they ruin it. Just listen the the music. And remember, Nobody's Perfect.

ahhhh dying. I Can't be Tamed. ;)



Nothing like an extraordinarily ordinary Sunday. Well, that's life.

Forrest, Forrest Gump.

These past few days have been hard. It's hurt. And I've been thinking about a lot. I'm pretty sure that most of you reading this know some of the things that have happened in the past. I hate talking about it, and I'm known to not say anything at all.

It's hard not to feel alone. Even if you know your friends are only a phone call away, or you live with one of your best friends and they are always there, sometimes you just realize that it's only you. Or you don't want to say anything, or always tell someone the same thing all the time. (This is starting to get sad, don't worry, it gets better!) So my friends started writing a blog and encouraged me to do the same. Then I saw how many people read it, and how many people loved it, and the pictures and comments and everything and I couldn't help but smile! I didn't feel as alone. So...thanks guys, I love you all sewwww much. <3

So I came home this weekend. I got home yesterday. I love coming home. There is just something that feels comfortable about Point Pleasant that you can't help but love. My mom and I had a lovely talk on the way home and then went to the McDonald's house for the greatest pizza ever. Seriously. So while the adults talked and drank wine, Colleen, Laur and I watched the famous Tom Cruise in "Oblivion." mind. blown. Literally had to stop the movie a few times to discuss what the heck was going on. Ya know that sci-fi film nonsense.

After we got home and I started on some homework my mom gave me some advice:

"I know it hurts. There will be happy days and there will be sad days. But no matter what you have to keep going. You have to remember the happy moments that you have with your friends and family and doing the things that you love. But remember that you are allowed to have those sad days too." thanks, mom. <3

Determined to get my homework done and gone I got an early start after chocolate chip pancakes. delish. So, in the spirit of getting work done, after my mom got back from a haircut I convinced her to go to the movies. We went to see the movie "Gravity" with Sandra Bullock and George Clooney. it. was. so. amazing. Go see it. The graphics were absolutely INCREDIBLE. seriously. go see it. I did get a bit nauseous in the beginning, but eventually you got used to it. It would be really cool to be in zero gravity and float around. See the Earth from outside. Watching the sunrise over the Earth and the endless stars in space...I'll just leave it at the movie was incredible. wow.

So after we got back from the movie I actually got all of my work done. Then I had a great home - cooked dinner of chicken and rice and peas and broccoli in this great sauce stuff. amazing. We turned on Nashville and made chocolate chip cookies (I like  chocolate...can ya tell?)

By then it was about time for my Disney pic of the day.


Disney Pic of the Day: Mickey Mouse

For some reason I think that the Disney sketches look better in black and white. I guess that 101 Dalmatians it is tomorrow huh? (wink wink) ;) We'll see. 

I also like sunsets. Sunsets are my favorite.

So I was watching Forrest Gump while I was drawing. Of course tears were shed, it's a great movie. But there was one part that really hit me. Forrest was running across America and he said something that his mama told him:

"You've got to put the past behind you before you can move on."

I'll have to work on it. That's all I've got to say about that.


Well, that's life.

Rawr.

No Disney pics these last two days. Sorry folks. Yesterday was insane and today I just wasn't feelin' it. Just wait for this weekend. Epic.

But here's a tiger just 'cause:

I drew it a little while ago.

So yesterday made me want to throw my computer across the room at my computer science professor because of the lab that he assigned us. The lab had three sections. First section, easy. Second section, easier. Third section, so incredibly difficult on something that WE HAVEN'T EVEN LEARNED. In fact, in the directions we were even told to look at a completely different chapter to figure it out!! what. is. that. I mean come onnnnnn. ugh.

Our lab was a partner project and I kid you not, my partner and I worked on our lab from 11:30-4 and 7:30-10:45 with not even a glimmer of hope. oh wells. On a separate note, I got my first Project back for CS. 80. I seem to be going on a streak here. I got 20 points off for ONE dumb change. As you can see, my professor is driving me a bit crazy. It's alright. I'm determined to get an A in this class. and I will.

So after completely wasting my wonderful Wednesday, I woke up for an optimistic Thursday. And once again...I was driven crazy. I cannot wait for the weekend. PLEASE COME SOONER. I had class, a meeting and two other classes before I nearly sprinted back to my room and dance around because I was done for the day. Ate some popcorn, watched New Girl, had a great dinner with Selena (and Jill showed up too!), headed to the lib to read a bit, then headed back to the room.

Then I got locked out. fan.freakin.tastic.

I waited in the lounge for Deanna to come back and now here I am. what a day.



While I was in class today I had a thought:

Isn't it interesting how you can look at someone and picture who they will become? That sounds weird. I mean that some people just have personalities that you can see being careers. There is this girl in one of my classes that I can see being the perfect teacher. And I can see one kid sitting in a Starbucks in the city on his laptop. And there is another girl that I can see living at the beach or California and surfing all of the time. This reminds me of a quote from Paper Towns:

"There are so many people. It is easy to forget how full the world is of people, full to bursting, and each of them imaginable and consistently misimagined."

Just a cool idea.


My brain is fried. Here's to a great Friday.

So, that's life.

Jasmine.

Yay it's October! I seriously love the fall. There's something about it that's just...comfortable. Yes, school is starting to pick up and is getting stressful sometimes, but there are just those days in the fall that make you happy to breathe. And if you hate fall, well too bad. I loooooove it. Reminds me of cross - country a lot. I miss running. I don't think I'd want to run here at TCNJ but high school was great. And if any of you out there are cross - country runners, you'll know exactly what I mean when I say that some days you just go outside and smell race day. Makes me happy.

Anyways, I went for a run today. My usual is two miles but for some reason I decided to go out for four when I got back from class. I absolutely did not regret it. I miss those long run days. It really just makes you relax. silly. So after my run I rewarded myself with an iced caramel mach at the lib cafe with meal equiv. #7dollaholla

Finally got my stuff together and showered and headed to the library for loads of fun. And fun was had. I got ahead for some classes (computer science) and I'm dragging a little reading in others(...Global Women Writers *cough*). It's alright. My motto for school work has always been "It'll get done." Mostly because it always does. No matter how much work I have I always manage to get it done and I just have to take it one subject at a time. That's really all you can do, so...it'll get done.

There is this amazing website called rainymood.com that plays rain and thunder and sometimes you hear birds too. I give it total credit for my productive library sessions. It helps me focus without words to focus on. Like classical music...except who doesn't love a little rain?

So eventually I was STARVING (surprise!) and got dinner with Dan and Deanna. Now we are in the process of helping Dee with her logic homework. E.Z. I gave up and decided to get working on my Disney pic of the day:

Disney Pic of the Day #3:

Dan picked it out. I'm not quite sure what she's holding but I just look up a picture online and draw what I see. UGH. I want to work in Disney so. bad. I would die. Tomorrow's pic will be better. Any suggestions?

So now here I am after a nice day listening to Kings of Leon. I've been on a streak lately. Obsessed with the new album. love. Looking into all kinds of new music though. Aly gave me a HUGE list of songs to download once and I've barely got through any of it. It's all on post - its. they. are. everywhere. I'm also going to go through old songs. Laura showed me this song on a Colleen's Corner (Miranda Sings) YouTube video one day over the weekend and I can't get it out of my head. It's great.

Whitney Houston. Gotta love her.


Well, that's life.