Paintings, Beaches, and Goats...Oh My.

WOW. I really need to start posting more regularly on here. Sorry folks. So I've got quite a bit to update you on....here it goes!

This weekend had its ups and downs. I watched Hocus Pocus with my mom, watched Harry Potter, went on bike rides, ate quite a bit (not surprised are you...?), went to the Halloween Parade, made cake pops, and of course, painted. Highlights were definitely seeing my friends together and going to Hoffman's like we usually do, and painting. I carved this pumpkin too!

A little Dracula Mickey for Halloween. 

I honestly could not tell you why I love painting so much, but it's something about the colors. The colors always amaze me. So, I came up with four pieces to bring back to school:

The artwork of the weekend. 

So, now I have almost completely run out of space on the walls, while Deanna's side remains..well...empty. Gotta spruce it uppp. 

So before going back to the conj I took a trip to the beach. It was windy, but so nice. I could've sat there all day if I was allowed to. But, I couldn't so I took a couple of pictures to hold me over until I go back home again.

I just loooooove it so much. You don't need music, no tv, no talking, you don't need anything. It's just you, sitting there, with an endless amount of space in front of you. Coming and going. So many people talk about comparing their lives to the ocean. And you really can, but there is something that really applies right now. Missing someone comes in waves. Some days are good, and some days are bad. They come and they go. And sometimes you feel the worst that you have in a while, and that is when the ocean water really recedes. But only when the water goes back this far, you can have enough momentum to move farther up the beach than you have before. 

Just a thought. 

Well anyways. I had such a nice time at home. But now after a little motivational chat I think I might have a chip on my shoulder. I'm ready to finish this semester, ready to work and ready to fight. We can all have those bad days, we're allowed to. But we do need to have the courage and the will to fight back with everything in our power to win. So, I applied to the Disney College Program today. If I'm not sure where I'm supposed to be right now, I think that is a step in the right direction. I'll know if I move to the next round by November 15th. Basically, the program is where I would work in Disney World and get PAID(hollllaaa!!) while taking classes. It's the perfect step to get to know people so maybe I can be an intern there one day, and then really start my career there. And I can't wait. 

So...right now everything is up in the air. Joining a sorority, studying abroad, staying at TCNJ, anything really. All I know is that I'm here because I'm supposed to be right now, and I'm taking it one day at a time. 

On a lighter note, Deanna and I were HYSTERICAL while on YouTube tonight. I was actually in tears from these videos, so I hope they make you smile too:

That's Life.

Lyin' Eyes.

Hai everyone. After not posting for more than 10 days (!!!) I've finally found enough motivation to post again. I've been having a hard time. Honestly, just going through each day sometimes can be rough. I have great friends. They help. Just being around them sometimes can make me feel a little better. Sometimes, you just need a hug.

We've got a four day weekend coming up here at TCNJ, and it could not come sooner. Seriously, longest week of my life. I can't wait for Point Pleasant food, the beach, movies, ice cream, and a lot of painting and art. Be ready. I've got some great ideas planned. I just love it so much. I've been listening to the same songs lately. Nashville soundtrack and The Eagles. The Eagles remind me of my dad so much. So it makes me happy and sad at the same time. It's really hard to explain. It makes you want to just go back. It's strange how many things you lose when something like that happens. And I just don't think that people understand that. I'm listening to this song right now:

It's nice. Music is just so....brilliant. It brings so many things. So many memories, it creates new ones, it makes you think about things. I actually have a music poster in my room. Love posters.

Yesterday I got one of the greatest surprises ever. I was complaining to Deanna that I was hungry and wanted to go eat and she kept pushing it back saying we'd go after she was done with her homework. So, after complaining a bit, I started reading and got really tired. Little did I know, Deanna and Aly were texting each other planning for her to come stay over tonight. So as I was sleeping, I was woken up by Aly calling me. I answered, tired and confused to her saying, "can you do me a favor? come outside?" Well, that woke me up. I wasn't having a great day yesterday and could not have been happier to see her then. So, she slept over and hung around today. Then part of the Brain Trust crew got dinner together, along with Dan and Deanna. (Hiiiiiiii Carl, this is for you!!) And we had a great dinner.

So, after dinner Aly left, told her I'd see her tomorrow, and back in my bed. Just one more class, go for a run, eat, clean the room, and home tomorrow night. Other than that, nothing else has really been going on. Just going through, day by day, and taking each step at a time. There's a really corny saying that I like:

"When you don't want to look at the past, and you're afraid to look at the future, look next to you and your best friends will be standing there."

I know that whether they are right here, or just a text message away, that they always will be. And that's nice to know. I don't know, this has been all over the place hasn't it....

Well, drawings and paintings to come, weekend is on its way, and well...

That's Life.

Disney Love.

I have the best friends in the entire world. They made me the greatest video in the entire world and I love them so much it's weird. OLIVE YEW GUYS. <3333

Did I mention that I love them? :)

For those of you who check up on the blog, sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been a little distracted lately. After my motivation kick on Tuesday, I've gone on a couple of runs, had my share of breakdowns, and of course, not ready for it to be Monday again. I haven't been too slammed with work, which I'm really happy about. I got all of my work due Monday done on Friday, and I've just been studying for a midterm on Wednesday. Oh joy. pumped.

Yesterday Deanna, Dan and I went to TCNJ Glow, or, as others call it, TCNDayGlow. clever little kids. It went on for FIVE hours, but we only stayed for two...ish. There were so many freshman there and once they started throwing paint the tarps we were standing on started to make everyone fall on the ground. One huge slip and slide. funs. After that Deanna and I left Dan with his friends and just hung out, ate pizzaaaaa, and watched tv. typical. Then I accidentally locked Deanna out of the room while I was sleeping...sorry girl!!

So today hasn't been eventful at all either. In fact, I've been feeling really awful today.  We didn't do anything last night and I feel so sick. I stand up and I feel dizzy and lightheaded and I've felt so awful all day, I've just been in bed. hope it is not the flu. I do NOT need that. hellllpppp :(

I had another thought today. During a commercial with babies in it, having fun and crawling around, something just came to me. (I know that sounds really weird but just bear with me!) When we are little we can just play and do what we want all day. And we can do this until we are about 13 or so. Then we have to start getting a job and working and then we are in high school. Then we go to college, and before we know it we are completely consumed in our careers and saving money for retirement and all of that. Why do we have to do that? I know we still have to, and I know that I will, and I know that I can't change it. But why? I don't want to work forever, I want to do things that I LOVE. I don't want to be stuck doing work all night long. I mean yes, I like computer science, and I want to do that, but it just seems like so much work, and I just want to enjoy everything in life. I don't know how all of you feel, but to me, it just feels a little silly.

I love Disney, as probably all of you know. If I could work there, I would be the happiest in the world. To me, Walt Disney was the kind of person who enjoyed life. He liked to show others how to enjoy life too. That's how I want to live my life. So, I think it is only appropriate for Disney quotes right now:

love.

Well, I guess that's life.

Over the Moon.

I'm not going to talk about my day today, because nothing especially exciting happened to me today. surprising, right? Anyways, I had an ordinary day until just now.

I was working on my computer science lab, listening to one of my rekindled favorites, Demi Lovato. Laying on my bed, I got distracted looking around my room and started getting annoyed because nothing was working. I was looking at all of my pictures when something caught my eye. Right above the end of my bed I taped a note to the wall that my mom wrote to me a few weeks ago. It was pretty long but I just sectioned off this one section. It says, "Love you too much! So very proud of you - we all are. Your dad would be over the moon with your successes. <333 Love, Mom." So, that made me sad. But I taped it right next to this picture:

So I looked hard at this picture. I just love this picture. And all of a sudden, I got motivated. I wanted to show him how I can succeed. I didn't want to lay in bed anymore, I wanted to get up and get stuff done. I wanted to be smart again. Be happier, be excited, go for a run, go and do something. I'm so proud to say he is my dad. 

So I went online and looked at inspirational quotes. Meanwhile, Demi is belting in out the background and I was just so...ready. So, I want you to see what I was feeling. I found these and I just got so inspired:

Listen to these when you are reading these quotes and get ready for life. 

 so I guess what I'm saying is that I'm one step closer. Maybe I haven't quite accepted everything as it is, and that will take time. But I can try to make it better. I can try to be happier. I'm not helpless. I can laugh, and I can smile. We're only given what we can handle, and the best that I can do it try. If I don't try, it was a waste of a chance. And I'm not going to waste any of my chances anymore. It's up to me. I know there will be days where it will feel like the world is crumbling down. It will hurt. And I'll be the first to admit that. But I'm not giving up. I think I've found that spark again. I lost it for a while, and I was in the dark. But it's my turn to lead the way now.  I want a great life, and I won't find it if I don't get up and live.

That's Life.

The Dance.

Ahh Sundays. I feel like everyone in the world should wake up listening to this:

Love.


So I'm back at TCNJ. It was nice being home, but the weekends home always seem to be so short. This morning I had lazy start, just laid in bed for a while before getting up to take a shower. I'll be honest, my diet today consisted entirely of cookies and kettlecorn. I'm not even sorry. :) So I decided to go downstairs and watch Aladdin. Always a favorite. I seriously love Disney, it always puts a smile on my face.

After minor iPod technicalities, my mom and I headed back to the good ol' conj. We listened to country music the whole way back. Apparently Alan Jackson was one of my dad's favorites, and Garth Brooks was also a huge favorite in our house when I was little. I love country music, I know for most people it's not a favorite but I just love it. Here's a favorite from Garth Brooks:

I feel like we listened to this song a lot over warm pancakes and orange juice on Sunday mornings. I just makes me remember a lot of things. Garth Brooks reminds me a lot of Christmas because we listen to a TON of his holiday songs. So you'll hear those too. I love how music can remind you of one thing every time you listen to it. I can remember when someone tells me their favorite part and I will think of them every time that part comes, or what we were doing exactly when we were listening to a certain song. I know that might be weird but music is such a great part of our lives, and there is so much to listen to and enjoy and share and it is just so wonderful. It's comforting and inspirational and it just means so much to me...and anyone really. Ask anyone.

So after my mom left and I hung out with Dan and Deanna as per usual, Deanna went to chapter and Dan and I had dinner. No vanilla ice cream today, a huge disappointment. But it's okay! I remembered that I brought back cookies and kettlecorn that I ate while watching Once Upon a Time when I came back. love. It's the perfect show for me. fairytales with a twist. If you haven't seen it, or even know what I'm talking about, go on Netflix and watch away. You will soon be obsessed. you're welcome. So after realizing that I have little to no self control when it comes to kettlecorn I had to eventually stop eating because all of the sugar was starting to hurt my mouth. oh wells, it was worth it. delish.

So now here we are, I'm laying on my bed, watching Miley: The Movement. It was quite the interesting program. I've always loved Miley, and even though she does seem a little on the crazy side...she's just being herself. Life's What You Make It. I admire that. And I love her music. She really is a Rock Star. Just don't watch the videos, they ruin it. Just listen the the music. And remember, Nobody's Perfect.

ahhhh dying. I Can't be Tamed. ;)



Nothing like an extraordinarily ordinary Sunday. Well, that's life.