Explore.

All right. Just take a deep breath, everyone, right now.

Happy Thanksgiving. I am thankful for so many things. I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for each and every one of my friends. I am thankful for warm food on the table, in a warm house, with laughter and music. I am thankful for sunshine and rain, and wind, and being able to feel deeply and love endlessly. I am thankful for the people who have been in my life and those who have gone, and for those who are yet to come. I am thankful for my And I am thankful for who I am, right here, in this moment.

Thanksgiving is always about being thankful, but I think that we shouldn't have just one day that we recognize all that we are blessed with. We should wake up everyday thankful for the people and the things that we have. I know I can't go preaching to the world, and I'll agree with you, sometimes you get so angry at things that have happened that you start to find things that you are jealous of and wish could have been different. But we cannot afford to think like that. If we just keep looking at what we don't have, we will eventually lose everything that we started with. Then we will end up with nothing. And where would we all be then? So I guess that it is good that we have one day to really think about all that we are thankful for, so that we are really reminded to be grateful.

I saw The Hunger Games: Catching Fire twice yesterday. Yes, I went twice on the same day. It was THAT good. Go ahead and judge, I don't really care, I'd go see it again really...aaaaanyways I've got two quotes to think about today, one from the previews and another from the movie. The first is from the upcoming movie 'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty,' which looks almost like a grown - up perks of being a wallflower(my favorite). It looks thought provoking and wonderful. About going and and "participating in life." So, one of quotes is:

"Life is about courage and going into the unknown."

I want to go somewhere. I want to find places like this:

I just...its so frustrating that I do not know how to say this. I want to explore, I want to feel free, I want to sprint along the road as the sun is setting, I want to scream and yell into the mountains, I want to find out what life IS. I want find someplace that I belong, and I want to find someplace that, at the same time, I could not be further from home. I want be happy. I want to find....happy.

The other quote is from Catching Fire, and I couldn't find it so generally it was something like:

"Life is not measured in the number of years we have lived, but in the number of lives we have touched."

I hope that I can impact people's lives in some way. I hope that I can make some kind of difference, provide some kind of insight, some idea that I thought of that inspired someone. I think the funny thing is that we might not really ever know if we do. Do you ever wonder how people describe you to another person? Do they like you? Do you make any kind of impact at all? We will never really know, will we, and more importantly, do we want to know? Should we even care? I know a lot of people say that "you shouldn't care about what people think of you." That's probably true. Except that I do care. I care about friendships, I care if something I did made somebody else upset, I care if it made them happy, and I just care about people. Maybe too much, but I think that for me, that is okay, it makes me, well, (as stereotypical as it sounds...) me.

Just some thoughts.

So, That's Life.

Let's go for a Drive.

I feel like I've been on a roller coaster today. Up. Down. And around once again. I'll try to explain.

This weekend was really fun. I saw Laura in a play called Twelve Angry Jurors. The acting was phenomenal, as per usual for the Point Pleasant Borough Performing Arts. Then after a veryyyyy long chat between my acting teacher and grandparents (who knew they had so many famous connections between the three of them?!) we finally headed back home. Ice cream with Aly, of course. Then back home to a somewhat restless night. I've been having such strange dreams. My mom says that the explanation behind them is that I feel like I don't have control of something. I won't bore you with them, because I read in a book once that "there is nothing as boring as listening to someone else's dream."

Anyways, Saturday rolled along as per usual and Laur and I took over the GameStop to find cheap DS games. Three used games later, we head back home and go to see a new kitten and a bigger kitty at Aly's house. Too much cuteness.

So Friday and Saturday were fun, but then Sunday rolls around. Wake up to the smell of French Toast and music, which immediately puts a smile on my face. Then mom starts changing the songs, telling me about which songs my dad would sing to me as a little baby. And I love it, but, as my favorite book says, "I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be." Well, after that I started to pack things up and Aly came to pick me up so we could go for a drive and listen to a playlist of music she made for me.

Let me tell you something about these drives. They are always perfect. I love how the music can get so loud that it feels like it surrounds every part of you. I love how you can feel the music in your bones. I love how you can smell the ocean air. I love the wind in your face. I love how we never have to say anything. I love watching things pass by. I love singing at the top of your lungs. I love just being. I love feeling infinite. And it is perfect.

I guess it's hard to explain. It's the small things that really make me truly happy. I think that makes a lot of people happy. I like getting a small note, or a hug, or when a friend makes you a cd, or even a friendship bracelet. I guess what I'm thinking is that we all need reassurance sometimes. We need someone to say "you really mean so much to me, I love you." or we just want to know that people care. I love making something for someone, just putting a smile on their face. And my friends love to do the same. I love them. So much. I love you guys, and you all know who I'm talking about. I love each and every one of you, and each of you mean so much to me.

I think that it is silly to be angry. I think that we should strive to smile. Just take a minute from our crazy lives and enjoy something. Go look at the sunset, hug a friend, or walk on the beach. Play the guitar and sing as loud as you can with your friends, or eat an entire roll of Toll House Cookie Dough. Watch your favorite movie, or stay up until 5am. Just take in everything wonderful and smile. Just be happy.

Here's one or two of my favorites from the playlist.

....or three :)

Well, just a thought or two.

That's Life.

Wishes.

Wow Halloween was the last time I wrote something? Pathetic. Especially because I have been thinking about so many things lately. No excuses but I really only like to post on the blog when I have some kind of artwork to put up as well, and since I've been SLAMMED with work, that clearly hasn't happened in a while. I've actually had this post waiting as a draft for a while and I'm not really sure why. oh wells.

Sooooo, my days have been no more exciting than usual. I went home this past weekend and met two of Aly's friends from school and we just laughed and laughed. It reminded me of when Deanna came to visit and saw Ally and Aly and we were in the diner and didn't stop laughing either. ya had to be there. Anyways, they were really really nice and I liked them a lot. I like to meet new people, especially when you hang out for a while and you just feel comfortable. It's kind of different. There's something unique in genuine laughter. Not nervous laughter, not pretend laughter, but real happy laughter. It's contagious.

I'm going home again this weekend(I know, I go home a lot right?) but this time I'm going to see Laur in a play called the 12 Angry Jurors. I'm excited about it, I always love going to see plays and musicals.

So I've been thinking a lot about wishes lately. Hope. Wishes. Dreams. To me they are all the same. And I am just full of them. And that's okay, because I like dreaming and I like having something to hope for, even if it is ridiculous sometimes. I think that if you don't have any wishes you might as well not have any imagination either, because sometimes creating something crazy may just come true. I mean, that's how Walt Disney World started. That's how Harry Potter started. The Hunger Games, Alice in Wonderland...I really could keep going. And look at what people have done with those dreams. Made them real. I know sometimes I lose myself in a wish and that is not a great thing, but sometimes it is just that wish that puts a smile on my face that same day. Imagination and wishes are timeless. It's like being a kid again. Why force yourself to grow up? Be silly, be goofy, be crazy, laugh, smile, hug someone. Because you should do whatever makes you happy. What's so fantastic about reality anyways?

Some people can't wait to grow up. They can't wait to get a job and have a new life and start in an apartment in the city. But I can. I remember standing on the beach one day when I was younger, about 10 or 11 and just thinking that life for me was so...simple in that moment. I lived at the beach. I woke up, went to junior guards, spent the entire day at the beach, and went home and did whatever I pleased. It was easy. And now, my life is do this assignment and that assignment, think about this, worry about that. When did life become so much more...complicated? And don't worry about me, I know that we need to grow up, focus on school, get good grades, stay on top of my work. But there will always be that part of me that just wants to be that kid on the beach again. The sun on my skin, the salty air on my face, and a boogie board in my hand. The summer when I was ten.

I've only got this for you today:

A picture of TCNJ that I took today.

And a bunch of song lyrics, working on my word art. Inspired by Carrie Underwood (if you can spot some lyrics in there)

And here are some more quotes, just to be inspired by:

Hopes. Dreams. Wishes.

That's Life.

Country and Origami.

Happy Halloween folks! There was a banana walking around campus today, along with a couple of pirates by the stud. quality.

Honestly, I hate Thursdays. I have classes and meetings all day long and by the time I'm done I'm wiped out and HUNGRY. Begged Deanna to eat with me after class and I was spotted by two crew teammates along the way, so it was a nice dinner. Miss crew...don't miss crew. It really is a draw. I don't miss getting up at 4am every weekday, erging every afternoon, fundraising, and COLD COLD mornings. Things I do miss...the team. The race. You know, I've always said that I don't like competition and never liked races but that, I've found out, is a lie. I love that competition. Running or rowing, I loved every minute of the race, no matter how much it hurt to keep going.

That's the thing with races. You never actually stop. I couldn't even tell you how many times I've THOUGHT about stopping but there was always a voice that said, "forget that, push harder." Anyone who has been in that position before would know exactly what I'm talking about. fantastic.

I've got my Disney interview tomorrow. I've thought about it though, and I'm not sure that it is the right time to do this. I'm still trying to get my grades up, and I think I'm just starting to get settled here. But I'm curious about the program so I'll still give it a shot and see where it goes. I got this far, right?

I've started to go back to origami again. I did it quite a bit a few years ago, we even decorated the Christmas tree with all things origami, popcorn and cranberries. It looked beautiful. So I'm going back to it. I have one design down flat, no directions. It's called a "Stellated Octahedron." Here's a picture of two that I made today:

They are like circles with points on them, but you can kinda get the picture.

Shout out to my sister Laur on one of the greatest Halloween costumes!! Have any of you seen Miranda Sings on YouTube? I didn't think it was funny at first but if you keep watching you will be laughing hysterically soon enough. Anywhoooo, that's who she went to school as so I have a picture for you from that too:

She can act EXACTLY like her too. It is literally hilarious. and the resemblance is uncanny. I love it.

I found out something about myself today. I need to do something creative everyday so that I don't actually go crazy. I was thinking about it, and whenever I'm home, I go to the piano when I'm feeling stressed out. So I think that I need to do something like that everyday for just a little while. I think that everybody should have something like that to do too. Just something that you love and helps you to relax. I think that people can forget to relax so quickly and just get caught up in the rush of everything around them. But it's really good just to take a moment.

Anyways, I've been in a country mood today, so here's a little Garth Brooks for you to enjoy:

Time for ice cream.

So, That's Life.

Fade into You.

Disney I am on my way!! well....hopefully. I have a phone interview on Friday at 3 so wish me luck!! I am so nervous and so excited and I really hope I get the chance to be a part of Disney magic. And, I'm not sure if it'll count for a ton of credits for school, but maybe that is just what I need. A little Disney magic and some hard work to help me remember who I want to be.

So today was okay. I had classes, and then group. Which we talked about a lot of things but I'm not sure anyone would really understand too well. It was kinda like a "you had to be there" thing.

Dinner was themed tonight. ohhhhhh the joys of Eick themed dinner. If you've never had one, come to TCNJ and experience it...because it is quite the experience. Tonight was a "Goulish gathering" which meant pink rice, questionable looking chicken, and food that was apparently supposed to look like the insides of a living thing. I've got three words for you TCNJ no.thank.you. So pasta and chicken it was, and even then it wasn't so great. shame.

Then the gang raced back up to the room and was welcomed by a phone call from the cutest cousins around. I could not stop laughing. The three of them were climbing up my uncle to try to see me, and after an accidental end of call mishap again (thanks Jackie) I saw Sofia's room and Andrew told me a hilarious knock knock joke. Ready?

"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Banana."
"Banana who?"
"BANANAPANTS!"

uhhhhh whaaaaa??

But it was hilarious because he absolutely cracked himself up. Literally rolling on the floor because he thought it was so funny.....

So after the facetime I started preparing for the Disney phone call and then it was 10. Nashville timeeeeee. (Sorry Aly!! No AHS for me tonight) And thank you abc for that surprising ending at the end of the show. mouth open. shocked. Love the music of this show so I HIGHLY recommend you listen to all of it because there is not one bad song.

On that note, I'll leave you with one of my favorites from the show so far and I really love it because of the lyrics, and if you listen to what they are saying I just think that it's actually amazing.

Got lots to do tomorrow, along with an advising meeting on Friday but...

That's Life.